Re: Callahan on Baker

["Dan Forant" <dforant1@xxxxxxxxxxxx>]

One of the best stories about ineptness I ever read. I don't dislike Baker,
I feel sorry for him. Here's hoping the Boston press makes him feel real
sick for 310 games. Maybe he'll snap out of it in the meantime.

DanF

----- Original Message -----
From: <Eggcentric@AOL.com>
To: <celtics@igtc.com>
Sent: Friday, December 06, 2002 7:49 AM
Subject: Callahan on Baker


> Half Baked: `Vin-sane' Celts trade a recipe for disaster
> by Gerry Callahan
> Friday, December 6, 2002
>
> They are just two years removed from the Rick Pitino disaster and
> just 2 games out of first place. They went to the Eastern Conference
> finals last spring and could go as far again this season. They've got
> two tough and talented All-Star players, a superb coaching staff
> and a supporting cast that brings energy and intensity into every
> game it plays.
>
> So how come we can't take our eyes off the sloth-like sixth man?
> Is this it? Is this the guy the Celtics got in exchange for Kenny
> Anderson and Vitaly Potapenko, the guy who has four years and $56
> million left on his contract, the guy who was going to be rejuvenated
> back here in New England in front of his family and friends? Is this
> what were going to be looking at UNTIL THE YEAR 2006?
>
> So how are we enjoying the Vinny Baker era so far?
>
> We heard all the spin when the Celtics made the trade, and some of us,
> regrettably, swallowed it whole: THIS, the Celts assured us, was not
> going to be the same slacker who wore out of his welcome in Seattle.
> This Vinny was going to be different from that Vinny, they said, and
> on that count, they were right:
>
> This Vinny is worse. Beyond worse. Worse than worse. How bad has he
> been? He has been ``Swept Away'' bad, Eric Dickerson-on-the-sidelines
> bad, the last two episodes of ``The Sopranos'' bad. He has been so bad,
> so out of sync, so completely overmatched, that he has at times been
> a bizarre and inexplicable distraction for viewers. It's like seeing a
> polka-dotted elephant walk across the track in the middle of
> thoroughbred race, only without the quickness.
>
> On Wednesday night, in the Celtics' 99-93 loss at Philadelphia, Baker
> missed an open layup, while standing still, directly under the front of
> the rim. He front-rimmed it. He failed to convert a layup after Antoine
> Walker found him under the hoop with a terrific bounce pass. And, of
> course, he could not cover Derrick Coleman, who won the matchup of
> overpaid, underachieving former All-Stars in a rout. Vinny was
> 1-for-4 in 14 slow-motion minutes. It was, sadly, a typical Vin
> Baker performance.
>
> Baker's inability to keep up - or at times even STAY up on his feet -
> has been a fascinating thing to observe. Watching him run the floor is
> like watching Marty Mornhinweg coach or Al Davis dress or Anna Nicole
> Smith think. He is Tony Clark in a tanktop, except Tony Clark made only
> $5 million in one dreadful season and now Tony Clark is gone, gone,
> gone. Vin Baker is here and he will be here - start the countdown -
> for the next 310 regular-season games.
>
> Thank you, Paul Gaston, you greedy, gutless, money-grubbing slug.
> Have a nice life. Hope your new yacht sinks.
>
> Give Vinny this: At least he has to show his face to get his millions.
> Gaston just sends his lawyers to collect his ill-gotten gains. If
> you're a loyal Celtics fan and you would like to hear an explanation of
> the Baker trade from His Highness, you're going to have to travel to
> Aspen and try to find him in a lift line.
>
> Gaston wasn't happy to just bleed his best customers dry. He saw an
> opportunity to sell his 49-win team for a few dollars more and
> decided to get on the receiving end of the luxury tax before pulling
> the trigger. Wyc and the boys had better be prepared: Before he
> surrenders the keys to Daddy's old team, Gaston will try to grab
> the air out of the basketballs. As Paul Pierce says of the new
> owners in Dime magazine, ``They can't do any worse than the last
> ones . . . right?''
>
> Celtics management was hoping Baker, a four-time All-Star and
> former Olympian, couldn't do any worse than he did in Seattle. After
> all, in 55 games last season, Vin Baker averaged 14.1 points and
> 6.4 rebounds.  It seems Rob Schneider will win an Oscar before Vin
> Baker throws in 14 for this Celtics team.
>
> On the season, he is averaging 5.3 points a game, and actually appears
> to have slowed down of late. He has just three hoops in his last five
> games, and coach Jim O'Brien has handed some of Baker's minutes to
> Walter McCarty, who has never been an All-Star or Olympian. All
> scoring aside, Baker seems to be having trouble just keeping his feet
> and catching the ball, and no one seems to understand how he got
> that crazy contract in the first place.
>
> Paul Westphal was the head coach in Seattle when Baker landed
> the seven-year maximum contract, but the former Celtics guard
> is not to blame for this one.
>
> ``When I got to the job in Seattle, he had been an All-Star four years
> in a row,'' said Westphal, now the coach at Pepperdine. ``But it was
> the lockout at the time, and I couldn't have any contact with the
> players. So the first time I met him, he was 40 to 50 pounds
> overweight, which means he had gained that much over one summer.
> And he started the year by missing 22 straight free throws, and it
> was just was not a good year.
>
> ``Having come off this disaster of a season, he wanted a max contract.
> My vote was to give him a one-year deal, but in the wisdom of the
> Sonic organization, they decided to give him the money. They said
> that year was an aberration. He had the same agent as Gary Payton,
> and they were convinced he'd be back. It was over my objections,
> but I guess I didn't object strongly enough.''
>
> Chris Wallace and O'Brien can certainly relate. When Seattle finally
> found a taker for Baker in Boston, the Celtics coaches and players and
> management had no choice. It was one last score for Paulie the Fraud,
> so the polka-dotted elephant was dumped in their laps.
>
> Good luck, boys, and don't let it get you down. He won't be here
> forever.
>
> After tonight, only 309 games to go.