Mike Fine: Schintzius Is A Natural Goofball

[Mister Ghost <mister_ghost@yahoo.com>]

Schintzius says he emulates Bart Simpson...




==
MG In Exile

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    [newStandard---------------copyright1996-------------

  Celtics' new center is 'natural goofball'               

  By Mike Fine, New England Sports Service          
                                                             
  WALTHAM -- Dwayne Schintzius fell in love       
  a number of years ago and had the name of his             
  wife tattooed on his right arm.
  Then he fell out of love. "You can't rub            
  it off," he said of the tattoo, so he had an
  artist fashion a panther to cover the name of his     
  ex-wife.
  "This other one," he said, looking at a
                                                        
  rambling piece of artwork on his left arm, "I             
  have no idea what I was thinking about."
  Then there's the one on his left ankle.           
  "That's my boy and mentor -- Bart Simpson. He's               
  who I try to emulate."                                    
  Schintzius may have been a dud throughout
                                                           
  his NBA career, but he's a comic stud, right up
  there with New Jersey funny guy Jayson Williams.    
  If he can be half as competent as Williams on the
  basketball court, the Celtics will be laughing         
  all the way to the playoffs.                         
  "I'm a natural goofball," said the 7-3            
  University of Florida product, who floated from           
  team to team before sitting out last year after         
  ankle surgery. "I've been walking around               
  whistling show tunes. Now everyone's starting to         
  get into it."
  Schintzius said he's too nervous to do           
                                                              
  standup comedy but is fine in large groups.
  Perhaps he could equate that to what he hopes is         
  a long stint with the Celtics. He'd like to do          
  some standup in the middle of the Celtics lineup,   
  but past history suggests he'll have problems.
  "I don't think he's always worked as hard
                                                         
  as he should have or appreciated just how great a      
  living this could be," said Celts general manager     
  Chris Wallace of the seven-year veteran, a 1990
  first-round pick of the San Antonio Spurs, who
  has never been more than a bit player in the          
  league. "Now that he's been away from it for              
  awhile, he's hungry to taste some success, and he        
  was very eager to get in (coach Rick Pitino's)           
  program.                                                   
  "He felt he needed a strong coach like      
  Rick, one who could push him, who could develop    
  him individually, and our staff is terrific at
  that. So I think this is a good marriage. Like
  with Kenny (Anderson, a former Schintzius               
  teammate at New Jersey), we need Dwayne, and            
  Dwayne needs us right now."                            
  Wallace admitted Schintzius is a gamble      
  and a project. The Celtics have placed no                
  immediate demands on him, realizing the big man           
  is still rehabbing. They've given him about a
  month to get his stuff together, but even that       
  could be a project.
  "I feel really good," Schintzius said,
  "other than the fact than I was totally          
  dehydrated and almost died the other day." Turns           
  out that after Saturday morning practice, he'd      
  dropped so much fluid that he needed to be hooked  
  up to a double IV. "One in each arm -- I looked
  like an octopus.
  "It was just a lot of running. I did a           
  lot of sweating. I wasn't able to eat the night
  before and keep any food down. Just a lot of
  fatigue set in. I had lower body cramps. The docs
  were tripping because they've never seen anything
  like it, but coach was happy because I came out
  Monday (Sunday) and played hard. I gave him
  everything I could."
  Schintzius knows he's 30. He's growing
  up. His rat tail is long gone, and his hair is
  now a golden blond shade. What he wants to do now
  is carve out the career that he's never really
  had.
  "Size is always going to be needed in
  this league," he said, "but I don't want to just
  stick around. I want to be one of those players
  who people know your name, not just because
  you've been in a movie ("Eddie" with Whoopi
  Goldberg) or you act goofy."


         Copyright © 1999 The Standard-Times.All rights reserved.