re: Re: Chad Ford Picks The Celtics 8th

[wayray@xxxxxxxxxxxxx]

Some give Snoop a flea bath and a de-worming, he's awfully irritated.
Ray

> ** Original Subject: Re: Chad Ford Picks The Celtics 8th
> ** Original Sender: Snoopy the Celtics Beagle <snoopy@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx>
> ** Original Date: Mon, 27 Oct 2003 11:21:20 -0800 (PST)

> I'm not sure which is potentially more annoying--that Chad Ford gets paid 
> to beat up on the Celtics or that Way does it for free.
> 
> I'm well and truly fed up with the denigrating comments about the C's and 
> the EC in general.  Let's take a look at the all-hallowed Wild Western 
> Conference.
> 
> We have over here "Exhibit A", otherwise known as the Portland 
> Trailblazers.  If the NBA ever opens up an expansion franchise in Tombstone 
> Arizona, then the Jailblazers should be made to feel right at home, and I'm 
> sure the City of Portland would welcome the exodus--if only to lower the 
> crime rate.  On those occasions when they're not increasing their personal 
> familiarity with law enforcement, they're experiencing meltdowns 
> reminiscent of the "China Syndrome"--but without Jack Lemmon to bolster 
> their credibility.
> 
> Ah, now here's an interesting find--the Utah Jazz, living proof to Danny 
> Ainge that having two bona fide superstars surrounded by nondescript 
> players does not a championship team make.  Now that Stockton and Malone 
> have accepted the inevitable--about 10 years too late--the Jazz will be 
> having an interesting season trying to stay out of the cellar.  but they 
> will have help there, provided by...
> 
> ....The Denver Nuggets, who decided it was a good idea to cut back on their 
> offense by getting rid of their best offensive threat--which is a little 
> like taking a water gun away from an annoying three year old.  The Mile 
> High Team will have such low scoring, they'll become known as the half-mile 
> team.
> 
> Onward we go, and here's the Minnesota Timberwolves.  I really liked Kevin 
> McHale as a player.  As an office-type person, he's worse news that 
> Hurricane Andrew was to Homestead.  All the business about how Kevin 
> Garnett was going to have a better supporting cast has been revealed as so 
> much smoke and mirrors to keep KG from doing what Payton and Malone 
> did.  Sam Cassell and Wally S. have been useless to them.  The T'wolves 
> used to give the Celtics fits every time they played.  Most recently, the 
> team fought each other far more than they did anyone from the C's fast 
> breaking upcourt.
> 
> The L.A. Clippers, who despite living in what is supposedly a great part of 
> the country, have to pay millions more than the going rate to get their 
> players to stay put.  That the owners and management haven't been fired for 
> incompetence tells me they've got fantastic photographs somewhere.
> 
> Mark Cuban is trying to outspend the entire rest of the league, figuring if 
> the Mavs can't play defense, he'll buy up everyone else's offensive players 
> and sit them on his bench.  Then Dallas can win by outscoring everyone 
> else's bench.
> 
> The Houston Rockets were so clueless they had Yao Ming taking outside jump 
> shots--when anyone bothered to pass their extremely tall center the ball, 
> that is.
> 
> Then we have the single biggest waste of potential in the NBA.  The 
> annoying, third-rate, L.A. Lakers.  Shaq should have been THE dominant 
> center of the last decade.  Instead he rests on his unearned rep as 
> "Diesel" or whatever he's calling himself this week.  Last season, Shaq 
> destroyed the Lakers by putting off surgery until just before the season 
> began.  Thus, he was completely out of shape for the first four months of 
> the season.  Only an extraordinary stretch of play by Kobe Bryant saved the 
> Lakers from total humiliation by way of not winning enough games to make 
> the playoffs.  This season, Shaq is supposedly in better shape, but Kobe 
> decided he was too traumatized to practice this summer.  Then he apparently 
> figured showing up for training camp in Hawaii was too much of a 
> bother.  Payton and Malone must be mentally kicking themselves to sleep 
> every night.  The LA-ZY Lakers are long overdue for their comeuppance and I 
> plan to enjoy every moment of it.
> 
> Now, having examined the West, let's try to deal ol' Chad some reality 
> about the East in relation to the Celtics.
> 
> He picked New Jersey first.  OK, they did win the EC title last year, but 
> after their "let's not bother" mentality of the preseason, they lack mental 
> toughness.  They're more fragile than Chad seems willing to accept.  Still, 
> the C's will have to wreak havoc upon them in the regular season--and 
> playoffs, presuming the opportunity arises--to be reasonably acknowledged 
> as the better team.
> 
> For second, Chad went with Detroit.  Fair enough based on their preseason 
> dismantling of the Celtics.  But the Pistons are still a team without a 
> defense once Ben Wallace takes a seat.  If the C's running defense runs 
> smoothly, the Pistons are in for some long nights.  In any case, Chad seems 
> to be unwilling to remember that the Celtics took the Pistons down in their 
> last playoff encounter.
> 
> In third, The Chad Man went with the New Orleans Hornets.   OK, we have 
> found the only sportswriter that thinks Tim Floyd is a better coach than 
> Isaiah Thomas.  Get real, man.  The Hornets have good players with bad 
> owners and now an even worse coach.
> 
> Fourth place in Chad's fantasyfest went to the Indiana Pacers.  Yes, having 
> Thomas as coach was a major problem for them.  But The PAcers were all too 
> willing to self-destruct no matter WHO ran the team.  Reggie Miller is only 
> about 50%--if that--of the player he was.  He's still good, but no longer 
> great, and definitely no longer the go-to guy.  Larry and Carlisle are a 
> definite improvement, but they're going to have to prove themselves better 
> than Boston--in their last meeting, they did not.
> 
> In the number five slot we see the Orlando Magic, otherwise known as the 
> 4077th east.  They need all the miracles modern medicine can provide just 
> to keep the only decent player they have from being unable make it up and 
> down the court on a regular basis.  This is a team better than Boston?  Nope.
> 
> The Sixers as number six.  Larry Brown was the only known person who could 
> keep Iverson more or less on track and even he finally left town in 
> frustration.  AI scores most of his points by throwing himself at the 
> defense and either making crazy shots or getting the foul call.  His 
> newfound sense of team play was great at the Olympic qualifiers, but now 
> he's got his normal teammates with him.  In other words, guys not as 
> good.  He'll be fed up with that pretty quick.
> 
> The Bulls in seventh place.  Chad actually says he likes this team better 
> than the other East teams.  Chad, old man, you have GOT to get those 
> medications adjusted.  The hallucinations are playing with your mind.
> 
> The C's drop to eighth and we realize Chad is winging it, apparently 
> unmindful of the universe his columns actually appear in.
> 
> I mean if Way is going to post fiction to the list, can't it at least be 
> GOOD fiction?  Bleah.
> 
> Snoopy the Celtics Beagle
> Please visit the <http://www.celticsbeagle.net/>Celtics Beagle Website

>** --------- End Original Message ----------- **