My thoughts today
SicilianMother at aol.com
SicilianMother at aol.com
Sat Apr 24 18:50:39 CDT 2004
Being a Who fan............it ain't pretty some times. But, I still very
much embrace it.
When I first got on this list a few years ago, I was almost completely
oblivious to the names of the listers here. When people wrote, I read it and
thought about it and then posted what I felt in my heart. I could give a shit if
anyone read it or who wrote what. That isn't what the writing was about to me.
It was like that for a long time. Slowly and almost reluctantly, I started
to remember who was who and who was into this or that. I learned who was
pro-Kenney Jones, who was anti-Who after John died, who was level headed and who
I like to listen and usually like to back up the women on the list,
especially since we are so outnumbered. I think it is interesting to hear Who comments
from a woman's point of view once in a while. The woman's Who perspective is
somewhat different if not rare. But, I think we need *more* estrogen here to
balance things out. The large amounts of testosterone around here make it an
interesting place for a woman like me to try and be herself. "I work myself
to death, just to fit in."
Oh, I have went to the female Who lists but definitely felt like I did NOT
fit in on those. I like to joke about Roger's cute hair in Tommy or Pete's cute
butt in his white work suit, but that is so not what the Who are about to me.
Although lately I have to admit after watching some old video's I am
developing a strange post humus crush on Keith Moon!
When I first saw how long time listers had so much history with each other
and how that played a part in how they posted, I thought that there is an aspect
to this part of being a Who lister that I am not experiencing.
Now I wonder, how did I exist here, so blissfully content before I had these
realizations and can I go back to that?
I think one of the most shocking things to happen on this list is when I
received a private email from an assumed lurker who told me they wished I would
do them a favor a blow my head off, I'd be doing the world a favor. Wow! That
person is taking this all WAY too seriously!! How could little 'ole Johanna
invoke such passionate hate? Another Jo-hater told me in very colorful and
angry language that I should learn to stop making up my own topics. Oh, I see,
I need to blindly follow others......NOT!!!
I swear though, the more I used to get into angry confrontations here, the
more appropriate it seems to me. Not that I like it, but those things mirror
what Pete has written about so much:
I could go on days about how the lyrics of this band, of this poet named Pete
Townshend interprets the thoughts in my own head. Also, the events of his
own life, although not identical, I can relate to: suicidal thoughts, being
wishy washy, acting on what is on my heart, not thinking about how others will
interpret my words, being caught being stupid, etc., etc., etc.,.
It cracks me up that we are all fans of the Who and most of Pete's stuff is
about being generally fucked up yet when a person, who is not Pete, does
something generally fucked up, it is so shocking and wrong (Please don't write back
to explain it to me, I know the answer!) If he does something weird, it is
f***ing brilliant. Why? "Because he is f***ing Pete Townshend!"
But, if nothing else, it certainly explains, why THIS Who fan loves the band
so much. They aren't very pretty, they aren't very nice and they are
definitely very angry. On most days, that describes me to a tee.
When I listen to their songs, it evens out this bi-polar c*nt (another loving
name giving to me in a private hate email by an anonymous lurker). I hear or
watch Pete, Roger, John and Keith and it feels like an old shoe. My brain
goes into a comfort mode. When that goes away, I won't be a fan anymore. *If*
that goes away, which I still expect it will and that is the main reason why I
still haven't gotten my Who tattoo. I still expect myself to grow up one
day. I don't want a tattoo to add to my hopefully short list of regrets.
But, the reason why I log this information into memory, isn't because I am a
glutton for punishment. It isn't because I have no life outside of this list.
With the size of my family and the responsibilities I have, believe me, this
list is extremely minor. I would even call it a hobby that I like to use as
a distraction. The reason I write and read here is because..........I don't
know. There is a good reason, but I haven't come up with it yet. When I
figure it out, I'll let you know.
Offensive Material Warning:
If you find this post offensive, inappropriate, or
disruptive, please ignore it. If you don't know how to ignore a posting,
complain to me and I will demonstrate.
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