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Sign post up ahead...



Camera fades up and pans left.  Rod Serling is seen standing in the
middle of a road somewhere; anywhere.  Music cues in...

"Blink-blink-blink-blink - blink-blink-blink-blink"

Music fades.

Rod Serling:  "Mark Leaman has entered another dimension, one that he's
unable to free himself from.  Mark suffers from what neo-scientists
call, Green Acres Syndrome, which is derived from the television program
of the same name.  The main character of Green Acres is Oliver Douglas
who views himself as the only sane man in an insane world.  Mark is
suffering from this very same ailment and is unable to find salvation.
However, the twist here as far as Mark is concerned, is that the
situation is reversed.  Mark has entered...  The Delusion Zone."

Music up...

"Blink-blink-blink-blink - blink-blink-blink-blink..."

>Yes, and that's what you're trying to do here...like a jilted
schoolgirl,

Look, if you're going to continue arguing with me, the least you can do
is come up with your own insults.  If you hate me so much, why do I
influence you so damn much?  I mean, c'mon man!  First your Subject
lines reflect my style, and now the insults?  Dammit man, it's a direct
contradiction!  It's akin to you of all people, lobbying for Bush!

>Why is what I do ANY of your concern?

Simple math moron (or should I say "maroon") - YOU, Mark, fucked with ME
(see "maroon", which is really just a color, right?).  It's not my fault
your not used to someone fighting back.  Sorry, but I never did and
never will take shit from bullies.  You haven't figured that one out
yet?

>You must get down on your knees every morning to thank the Big G that
Trent Lott
>proves you're not THE stupidest person on the planet.

There's one...

>you must be taking this new Bush McCarthyism too effin' seriously.

And there's two and three.  Three political references in a two stanza
reply.  Can anyone say, "obsession"???  If you focus 1/100 of this weird
political obsession of yours towards improving your personality, you
could cure your delusions easily.  Hey, don't say I never tried to help
you out.

>(with apologies to Frank Zappa)

See?!?  Improvement already.  You actually apologized to someone.  It's
a good sign and positive first step, but next time, try apologizing to
someone who's alive; it might make all the difference in the world AND
lead to personal healing.

And now, a few lyrical changes that I'm only SUGGESTING - don't get your
panties in an uproar, I'm only trying to work closer towards the truth
here:

(Who) Status Back Baby

>I'm losing status on the Who list
(Gotta have a little status first, before you can lose it.)

>I guess that I should be so pissed
(Don't be pissed; get help instead.)

>(WAH WAH WAH WAH)
(Verbal rendering of your reaction every time I stand up and fight
back?)

>I was the king of every list activity
(Gosh, not too huge an ego.  King?  I think it's time for a coup then.)

>But that's no more...
(Ha, never was.  Oh, forgive me, your Majesty.)

>Oh mama, what will come of me?
(Scientific experiments, probably.)

>The other night we discussed the Coasters
>I was put down by some posters
(Would that be your New Kids on the Block poster?  Oh, "posters"...I get
it.)

>(WAH WAH WAH WAH)
>A bunch of conservatives
>Looked down their nose at me
(Hey, if the shit fits...)

>They had posted tons of EMails, I had posted three
(Denial ain't just a river in Egypt.  Although, I'm beginning to wonder
if you actually do believe that.)

>I hear the secret whispers everywhere I go
(I'm not paranoid, it's just that everyone's out to get me!  No secrets
from me at least.  You know exactly how I feel about you.)

>My Who spirit is at an all time low
(Well then by the tone of your little ditty - sorry I won't make anymore
weenie references about you - by the tone of your "song", then if YOU'RE
down, anyone who isn't must be a Conservative disciple of evil?)

>Everyone in town knows I'm a handsome music star
(Wow, that's worse than the King reference!  No, correction:  You THINK
everyone in town, etc...)

>I sing and dance and grow my hair and drive a shiny car
>I'm friendly and I'm charming I belong to *De Molay*
(They also say that Hitler could be a friendly/charming on a good day
too.)

>I'm gonna try like mad to Get my status back today
>Status back, Baby, Status back, Baby
>Status back, Baby, Status back, Baby

Try no more, my friend.  You're status isn't just back, it's ELEVATED!
Yeah, you aren't just a complete kook and a hypocrite, you're also an
egomaniac.  Good for you.  Long live the King!!!

"Blink-blink-blink-blink - blink-blink-blink-blink"

Otto in Colorado (Ass-HOLE!)

PS - To my fellow listers:  If you're new to the list, then you probably
don't realize that Mark and I don't play well together in the
schoolyard.  I'm sorry, I'm indulging myself as Who-news is rather slow
presently.  But if you've had enough of our verbal upchuck-ance, please
feel free to let it be known, and I'll accept the group wishes
accordingly.  I know this stuff gets boring after awhile, but sometimes,
he just sets the table and I have to eat!  Just post a "cut it out" in
response to this PS of mine, and I'll be happy to oblige.  Thanks.  Oh,
but don't expect the same from my adversary.  He can't help himself.