Re: New Pete diary

["Schrade, Scott" <sschrade@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx>]

> Pretty strong words there, playa partner bouyee. :-)

Yeah, I'm a real tough guy - sitting here alone behind this keyboard.  I
could've been in the Warriors!  ("Who *are* the Warriors?")

> (I knew better than to think it would have a happy ending.) 

You know me - I can *always* find *something* to complain about.

> ....and started counting how many shots you fired over the exchange  

You know, in all the excitement I kinda lost track myself.  ;-)

> I took the NON self serving approach.  You however, aired about how YOU 
> felt in all of this, which is what the list is for by the way, demanded 
> satisfaction from Pete and we *dared* to call you on it.  And you call 
> *us* self serving Fuck-heads?

Good point.  I think *all* our discussions/arguments were self-serving
to some respect.  We all had an idea of how Pete should handle the sit-
uation.  And that idea was formed from each of our personal "relationships"
with Pete.  You yourself weren't exactly silent on the issue.

> I wonder if you were just ashamed of Pete because your friends were 
> making fun of you.  

Not quite.  I was ashamed of Pete because of his actions.  Getting cracked
on & badgered was just icing on the cake.  I'm the local Who lightening 
rod around these parts.  People see me when they see The Who.  I see myself
when I see The Who.  I felt like I was fighting for Pete & he didn't give
a shit.

> Mine didn't make fun of me because I'm not a prick to them. 

Maybe you just don't have as many friends as I do.  ;-)

> Just kidding, but that's how I perceive you'll perceive what I'm saying

Oh thanks, Jon.  Now you're not even letting me misconstrue what you say!
Some friend *you* are!  ;-)

> Is this what bothered you about Pete?  Did you feel because he had a 
> weakness, you had a weakness?  

I don't know if "weakness" is the right word.  "Problem," maybe.  Pete had
a problem, so I had a problem.  Pete was in trouble, so I was in trouble.
(Please don't read that literally - *I* was never taken in for questioning.
I raelize Pete had much more to lose than me.)

> I felt bad for him, not me.  

I didn't feel bad for *me,* I felt bad for him, too.  But I also felt frus-
trated that the idiots coming up to me making their jokes were clueless &
had formed an opinion based on humor & a fondness for celebrity-bashing.

> Now that he apologized, I feel even better, 

Ah *HA!*  ;-)  So you're saying you were satisfied & feeling good *without*
the apology, even though an apology would've made you feel *better.*  I
don't recall you mentioning that before.  I thought you had reached your
highest level of contentedness, with or without the apology.  Now, if I
hear you correctly, you're saying that your feeling of contentment had a
higher level to reach.  A level only reached via an apology.  Hmmmm..... 

> You cannot "demand" respect nor an apology.  They have to be earned and 
> come from the heart.

If I ever "demanded" an apology I was joking.  I realize I cannot demand
anything from Pete.  PSYCHODERELICT would've been better if that were the
case.  I can only hope & wish.....

> I never claimed to know Pete so well nor do I consider myself more "pure" 
> because I give him some slack. 

Then why were you non-considerate (?) of those who hoped for an apology?
(By the same token, why was *I* non-considerate of those who didn't. I
don't profess to have all the answers here.) 

> Because I don't know him, I choose not to judge him. 

This coming from the guy who worries about his reliance upon sea imagery
as opposed to river imagery!

> An apology is not an admission of weakness to me like you might suggest.

I should hope not.  Many of my questions were of course rhetorical.  An
apology is a sign of intelligence, strength, & self-control.

> This is good news to me because it means he is starting to get over the 
> pain and can look to our feelings now.  

Oh my gosh!  What's the date today?  We agree on something!  ;-)

> He's a human being.

And I bet he doesn't believe all the things he's seeing.
  
> I see I have been upgraded from a fuckhead to a lunkhead, so I feel a 
> little better. 

Don't get used to it; I'm sure I'll say *something* insulting in the next
few days.  ;-)

> Anyhow, to answer your question this is how I feel about it.

Thanks for taking the time to respond.

> Gangsta.

You Warriors are good.  *Real* good.


- SCHRADE in Akron