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Re: A "boy" thing.



In a message dated 12/10/2003 6:28:53 AM Pacific Standard Time, 
Kevin.ONeal@xxxxxxxxxxxx writes:

>kid came up the street, he kicked the shit out of him. It was terrible for 
me 
>to see, but of course my husband said he had to do it..."It's a boy thing." 
I 
>think you all can agree with that,

<What???
<No, I don't agree with that..at..all.
<At all.
<It's not a "boy thing", or an anybody thing.
<What it is, is a *FUCKED UP* thing!
<No boy (or girl) should be permitted to go and "kick the shit out" of anyone 
<<<<<(must...refrain..from...obvious...Mc-joke).
<Your instincts were correct.  It *is* a terrible thing, and shouldn't be 
permitted.

The point Sandy was making, is the nature of boys in general.  

The day I learned to admit that my children were just like real people, and 
aren't perfect, was an extremely liberating day for me.  I used to be horrified 
when my children mis-behaved.  I still do not like it, but I learned to say 
"fuck it" to people who criticize me, because of my kids behavior.  I only 
discipline my kids in public when absolutely necessary.  I definitely discipline, 
punish and teach them in a private and as respectful as possible, depending on 
the offense.

I believe, mother to mother, Sandy was backing me up and practicing the 
freedom we feel to openly admit, our kids can be naughty, and it can be downright 
scary what they are capable of.  I doubt she was cheering her son on, when he 
was being a bully.  I admit, my boys can be bully's too, I hate it, but I still 
love them.  They don't get away with it either.

But, I have that anger thing going on too, and to a certain extent, it is 
healthy.  The Who's music, especially but not exclusively Quadrophenia, speaks to 
me, in that way.  Had Enough is a great song regarding anger too.

Jo :)