Re: Glancing very briefly at the songs I write: Sunrise

[Keithjmoon70@aol.com]

In a message dated 3/20/02 8:26:16 PM Eastern Standard Time, 
schrade@akrobiz.com writes:


> > "Some times I've let myself down
> > My head spinning round
> > My eyes seeing only you
> > The chances I've lost
> > Opportunities tossed away and into the blue"
> 
> The simplistic cliche's keep coming:  "...let myself down," "...head 
> spinning,"
> "...eyes seeing only you," "...chances...lost."  The last line is OK but it 
> can't
> save the stanza.  Hardly fresh word use here.
> 

He more than made up for this in the song Athena.  Have you ever listened to 
the fresh word use in that one?  "It had a snake the size of a sewer pipe 
living in it's rib cage." What the hell was *that* all about?

I read through the post that you sent and thought "Maybe I don't like Sunrise 
after all." 

No, not really.  It is gorgeous.

Jon in Mi.