humor, yes humor; you don't like it......sorry

["christopher n. collier" <collier@iglou.com>]

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>  > >YOU MIGHT BE A GEN X'ER If...
>  >>
>  >>you wore anything Izod, especially those windbreakers that folded
> up
>  >>into a pouch you could wear around your waist.
>  >>
>  >>you owned a Jordache pocket book (or several of them), or you
> remember
>  >>when Jordache jeans were cool.
>  >>
>  >>in your fifth grade class picture, you're wearing an Izod shirt
> with
>  >>the collar up.
>  >>
>  >>You were afraid of the Sleestaks on Land of the Lost.
>  >>
>  >>you know, by heart, the words to any "Weird" Al Yankovic song.
>  >>
>  >>the Brady Bunch movie brought back cool memories.
>  >>
>  >>you remember the first time "Space: Above and Beyond" aired - it
> was
>  >>called "Battlestar Galactica".
>  >>
>  >>You ever rang someone's doorbell and said "Landshark".
>  >>
>  >>three words: "Atari" "IntelliVision" and "Coleco". Sound familiar?
>  >>
>  >>you remember the days that hooking your computer into your
> television
>  >>wasn't an expensive option that required gadgets - it was the ONLY
>  >>WAY to use your computer!
>  >>
>  >>you remember the days when "safe sex" meant "my parents are gone
>  >>for the weekend".
>  >>
>  >>you remember "Friday Night Videos" before the days of MTV.
>  >>
>  >>you ever owned a pair of "Pop-Wheels" - that handy little
> combination
>  >>of shoe and roller skate that lasted about a year on the open
> market.
>  >>
>  >>a predominant color in your childhood photos is "plaid".
>  >>
>  >>you see teenagers today wearing clothes that show up in those
>  >>childhood photos, and they still look bad.
>  >>
>  >>while in high school, you and all your friends discussed elaborate
>  >>plans to get together again at the end of the century and play
> "1999" by
>  >>Prince over and over again.
>  >>
>  >>you remember when music that was labeled "alternative" really was.
>  >>
>  >>you, yes you, sat down and memorized the entire lyric sheet to
> "It's
>  >>the end of the world as we know it".
>  >>
>  >>you took family trips BEFORE the invention of the mini-van. You
> rode
>  >>in the back of the station wagon and you faced the cars behind you.
>
>  >>
>  >>you've ever conversationally used the phrase "Jane, you ignorant
>  >>slut".
>  >>
>  >>you watched HR Puffenstuff as a child, but now that you're older,
> you
>  >>really understand that it would have been much better had you known
>
>  >>about drugs at the time.
>  >>
>  >>you've recently horrified yourself by using any one of the
> following
>  >>phases:
>  >>- "When I was younger"
>  >>- "When I was your age"
>  >>- "You know, back when..."
>  >>- "Just can't (fill in the blank) like I used to"
>  >>
>  >>Schoolhouse Rock played a HUGE part in how you actually learned the
>
>  >>English language.
>  >>
>  >>you're starting to view getting carded to buy alcohol as a GOOD
>  >>thing, and you're ready to marry the next person who cards you when
> you
>  >>want to buy cigarettes.
>  >>
>  >>you ever dressed to emulate a person you saw in either a Duran
> Duran,
>  >>Madonna,or Cyndi Lauper video
>  >>
>  >>the first time you ever kissed someone at a dance came during
> "Crazy
>  >>for You" by Madonna.
>  >>
>  >>you remember with pain the sad day when the Green Machine hit the
>  >>streets and made your old Big Wheel quite obsolete.
>  >>
>  >>the phrase "Where's the beef?" still doubles you over with
> laughter.
>  >>
>  >>you read the "Hot Video Games Player's Secrets" guide for Mortal
>  >>Kombat just so you could find the hidden screen, and play Pong
> again
>  >>for old time's sake.
>  >>
>  >>(guys) your first erotic dream occurred to thoughts of Jeannie,
> Marsha
>  >>Brady, Samantha from Bewitched or, for those hardcore comic fans
> out
>  >>there, Daphne from Scooby Doo, Josie or any one of her Pussycats.
>  >>
>  >>(girls) you thought Sean Cassidy was "dreamy", lusted after "Ted,
> your
>  >>ship's photographer" on the Love Boat and Chachi, or, to keep it
> fair
>  >>to the comically interested, thought Fred was just a hunk on Scooby
> Doo.
>  >>
>  >>this timeline appropriately describes actual events in your life:
> Star
>  >>Wars opens, you are still in single digit ages, and you think the
>  >>creatures are WAY cool. Empire Strikes Back opens, you are now in
> early
>  >>double digit ages, and you are convinced that the special effects
>  >>much better, the characters are cool, and you want one of every
>  >>collectible
>  >>out there. Return of the Jedi hits the theaters...you are now a
> teenager
>  >>and you cannot get your eyes off Princess Leia's breasts or ***Han
>  >>Solo's
>  >>butt.*** You fantasize forever and ever about it, and send off to
> join
>  >>every fan club for them on the planet, hanging posters, photos, and
>
>  >>"teen"-type magazine spreads all over your walls and lockers at
> school.
>  >>
>  >>you've ever shopped at a Banana Republic or Benetton, but not in
> the
>  >>last five years, okay?
>  >>
>  >>you're starting to believe (now that it wouldn't affect YOU) that
>  >>maybe having the kids go to school year-round wouldn't be such a
> bad
>  >>idea after all.
>  >>
>  >>you're doing absolutely nothing with anything pertaining to your
> major.
>  >>
>  >>going to keg parties no longer involves hiding out in the woods
> when
>  >>the cops show up.
>  >>
>  >>you ever wanted to be gagged with a spoon.
>  >>
>  >>U2 is too "popular" and "mainstream" for you now.
>  >>
>  >>you ever used the phrase "kiss mah grits" in conversation.
>  >>
>  >>you remember trying to guess the episode of the Brady Bunch from
> the
>  >>first scene.
>  >>
>  >>you spent endless nights dreaming about being the Bionic Woman or
>  >>Wonder Woman or the Six Million Dollar Man.
>  >>
>  >>you had ringside seats for Luke and Laura's wedding (on General
>  >>Hospital).
>  >>
>  >>you remember "Hey, let's be careful out there".
>  >>
>  >>you're parents wanted you to attend medical school, but you decided
>
>  >>it was pointless since Quincy got all the babes, anyway.
>  >>
>  >>you know who shot J.R.
>  >>
>  >>this rings a bell: "and my name, is Charlie. They work for me."
>  >>
>  >>You ever wanted to learn to play "Stairway to Heaven" on the
> guitar.
>  >>
>  >>You were unsure if Diet Coke would ever catch on, after all, look
> at
>  >>Tab.
>  >>
>  >>You know all the words to the double album set of Grease.
>  >>
>  >>You ever had a Dorothy Hammill haircut.
>  >>
>  >>You sat with your friends on a Friday night and dialed
>  >>"8-6-7-5-3-0-9" to see if Jenny would answer.
>  >>
>  >>"All-skate, change directions" means something to you.
>  >>
>  >>You owned a pair of Rainbow suspenders just like Mork used to wear.
>
>  >>
>  >>You bought a pair of Vanns and wanted to order a pizza in history
>  >>class so you could be just like Jeff Spicoli in Fast Times as
>  >>Ridgemont High.
>  >>
>  >>You owned a preppy handbook.
>  >>
>  >>You were too young to go see the Blue Lagoon so you just had to
>  >>settle for second hand reports.
>  >>
>  >>You remember when there was only "G, PG and R", none of this PG-13
> crap.
>  >>
>  >>You learned to swim about the same time Jaws came out and still
> carry
>  >>the emotional scars to this day.
>  >>
>  >>Wonder twin powers, activate . . . form of a an iceberg, shape of
> an
>  >>eagle.
>  >>
>  >>You remember when your cable TV box had the three rows of numbers
>  >>and you had to move the selector switch accordingly.
>  >>
>  >>You ever actually tried to turn on a jukebox by hitting it twice
> and
>  >>saying "heeey".
>  >>
>  >
>  >
>   >>
>



- --
christopher n. collier
collier@iglou.com

SCCA Member
R254561
Region 017

97 VW Jetta GLX VR6
Digest Version of Mods Available Upon Request.......

In search/need of a 2.0L 16v engine for project car


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