Thomas Talks Toine

[Way Of The Ray <wayray@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>]

http://www.southcoasttoday.com/daily/07-03/07-03-03/b01sp087.htm

Not the answers this caller wants to hear

 The telephone rang just after 9 on Tuesday morning. It was Dave with
his usual boatload of sports-related questions.
 "Is it true the Celtics are going to trade Antoine Walker?" he asked.
 "If you're a Celtics' fan, you can only hope so," I answered.
 The response didn't sit very well with ol' Dave.
 "C'mon," he screamed. "Antoine Walker is one of the top players in the
NBA. Why would the Celtics want to trade him?"
 "Maybe it's because they don't feel the same about him as you do," I
answered.
 "C'mon," he screamed again. "All he does is finish first or second in
team scoring every season. How do you explain that?"
 "He takes more shots in one season than a senior citizen center does
during a normal flu season, and the latter's percentage of success is
usually a lot higher," I answered.
 "I heard they're trying to trade him to the Knicks, is that right?" he
asked
 "That's one of the teams rumored to be interested," I answered.
 "Who could the Celtics get from them that would be better than
Antoine?" he asked.
 "Latrell Sprewell," I answered.
 "You mean that guy that choked his coach a few years ago? How is he any
better than Antoine?" Dave asked.
 "Because Sprewell chokes people. Antoine just chokes," I said, using
his high number of turnovers in crucial situations and 66 percent
shooting from the free-throw line as examples. "Besides," I said. "While
Walker has a tendency to run his mouth and pick up technicals, Sprewell
spends a lot of his playing time running the floor picking up easy
baskets."
 "But Sprewell's a lot older (six years) than Antoine," he pointed out.
 "And a lot quicker and probably less expensive in the long run." I
reasoned.
 "Aw, you just don't like the Celtics, do you?" Dave asked.
 "I love the Celtics. It's Walker I can't stand," I answered.
 "Well, what about the Red Sox?" he asked.
 "What about them?" I responded.
 "Do you think they can get a guy like (Bartolo) Colon from the White
Sox when Chicago falls out of the race?" he asked.
 "The way things are going, Chicago may be thinking about trying to get
(Derek) Lowe when the Red Sox fall out of the race," I answered.
 "What are you talking about? The Red Sox will at least finish second in
the (American League) East and that would probably give them the wild
card ... wouldn't it?" he asked.
 "Possibly is a better word," I said. "Right now, the White Sox are
closer to first place in their division than the Red Sox are in theirs
and Chicago is thinking about adding players rather than subtracting
them. The Red Sox will definitely try to get a pitcher, but with just a
one-game lead over Oakland in the race for the wild card, and a handful
of other teams still in the running, they'll have to focus their
attention on teams definitely out of the race."
 "Like who?" he asked.
 "Like Baltimore (Sidney Ponson), Detroit (Mike Maroth) or San Diego
(Brian Lawrence or Jake Peavy)," I answered. "And, if none of those
potential moves pan out, there's always Antoine Walker."
 "Huh? How's that?" he asked.
 "He can't hurt the Red Sox any more than he's hurt the Celtics," I
said.
 "Goodbye," said Dave, just before he hung up.

Buddy Thomas' column appears on Thursday in The Standard-Times.