Dangerous Signs

["I'd trade it all for even more." <DANP@accint.com>]

Although it was great to see the Celtics win last night, a dangerous sign has
appeared that should cause considerable concern:  Antoine Walker has started
strutting.

As any longtime NBA fan knows, players that strut do not lead their teams to
championships.  Since strutting is a relatively new phenomenon in the NBA,
lets take a look at the Finals matchups for the past five years:

1992: Chicago vs. Portland  -- Winner: Chicago
- ----------------------------------------------
Hmm, not a lot of strutting going on here.  Clyde, Michael, Horace, and 
Scottie are all gentlemen and good sports.  Maybe a little strutting by
Cliff Robinson - I guess I'll blame him.

1993: Chicago vs. Phoenix -- Winner: Chicago
- --------------------------------------------
Can't explain this one.  Can't think of anyone who was strutting around.
Maybe Barkley did some strutting in the locker room.

1994: Houston vs. New York -- Winner: Houston
- ---------------------------------------------
Ah, now this series proves a point.  New Yawk is *loaded* with strutters.
Anthony Mason, John Starks, and Patrick Ewing.  Well, Ewing yells and stares
and whines more than struts, but it's still pretty annoying.  Horry almost
cost Houston the series with a little strutting himself, fortunately Hakeem
was the ultimate professional, putting them over the top.

1995: Houston vs. Orlando -- Winner: Houston
- --------------------------------------------
Heh, heh.  Orlando never knew what hit 'em.  Between O'Neal, Nick Anderson,
and Dennis Scott, they strutted themselves to a sweep.  I guess there was
just too much strutting for Penny to overcome - he should've helped them
win at least one game with his attitude.

1996: Chicago vs. Seattle -- Winner: Chicago
- --------------------------------------------
Can't explain how Seattle even won two games with Shawn Kemp, who struts
after every dribble.  Add Gary Payton to the mix and you wonder how they
made it to the Finals.  Then again, any team with Rodman as an opponent has
a chance.  Nevertheless, nonstrutters Jordan, Pippen and company take the
title.

Antoine, please, if your out there:  Curb the strutting.  Anyone strutting on
an 11-32 looks like an idiot.  Even if you'd won all 43 games so far, as you
can see, it still spells disaster come playoff time.  A Magic Johnson-esque
excitement or a Larry Bird game-face would be great, but *please*... no more
strutting!

Dan
Tongue firmly in cheek...

*********************************************************************
* E-mail: danp@accint.com                 10 Heritage Drive         *
*    Fax: (617) 494-8404                  Salem, MA 01970           *
*********************************************************************